Day 11-Know Your Role!
I Peter 3:8-9: Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil, or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.
There’s that dreaded word!!! You knew it was coming! You prayed I would stay away and you made it to day 11 before the word appeared! But appeared it did! We all hate this word. We all at one time or another cringe at the thought of submission. Why is that? Well as I have said many times over in my blogs, it is trained. We are trained in our modern society to believe that the word submission and the act of submission is bad. The world teaches us that submitting to anything makes you weak. But we have a role in society as a citizen, which requires us to submit to the authority of the laws of our county, law enforcement, judges, governors, presidents, kings or queens; all of which are forms of submission that we must adhere to no matter what country we live in or whether we are male or female. We submit every day to some form of authority. Submission to your husband is nothing more than accepting your role in God’s design of the family. It does not make you weak or less human than your husband. To be very frank, I need to warn you that if you are reluctant to be in submission to your husband, you can’t be in right standing with God. It is impossible to have an unhindered relationship with the Lord when you refuse to submit to the authority he has placed over you. Now, let me be clear ladies…never in my marriage to Adam have I felt as if I was the “lesser” of the couple. He has never forced me into submission but has lovingly directed me to God the way Ephesians 5:25-28 instructs him to do. However, in my previous marriage, I did experience forced submission. It was a word that made me cringe and honestly that marriage left a fear of submitting to any other man when it ended. I am very grateful that I did not allow that fear to keep me from remarrying, as I have come to find what God’s intention of true submission is in marriage. I love my role as Adam’s wife. And that is exactly what submission is…a role! Just like I have a role as a citizen of my country, a writer for Messy Life Praying Wife, a mom, a pastors wife, and a daughter of God; I too have a role as a wife. Ladies, let it not be said of us that we were looked down upon but let us teach the next generation of women what true submission looks like. It is our job to teach our sons and our daughters what Gods true intention of submission was when he created marriage. It is our job to display true submission in our relationship with our spouse so that our children can see the beauty that a godly marriage has. I love that because Adam is in submission to God that he understands the role that I have as his wife and lifts me up in our relationship versus tearing me down. True submission to your husband should be a joy, not work. When you let go of your fear and misunderstanding of the word, you will find freedom in your submission and an unhindered relationship with your husband and with your LORD!~Coren
Men: The Manly Side
Okay, so what is the job of the husband? I mean, the main job, the one mentioned more than all the others. We were given a longer list than the women, but the main one is to love our wives like Christ loved the church. Did the church deserve Christ’s love? No. Then who are we to decide whether our wives deserve our love or not? If Jesus loved the church even though the church was underserving of His love, then why would our wives not deserve our love also? In the Ephesians passage of our text it tells us that we should sanctify our wives. We should present her to God as holy and without blemish. I guess that means we can’t bruise her, huh? I have never hit my wife, but I know some of you out there have, you know who you are. I, of course, am not saying I have never wronged my wife, or that I have always given her all my love. I am human and make mistakes just like you. I too let my anger get the best of me. Think about the words “sanctify your wife.” I can’t make my wife holy, but I can love her like she is, just like Christ loved the church as if they were holy. I can set my wife apart from the wives of the world simply by giving her the love of Christ. No man who is still a child of the Devil can love in this way. I present my wife holy, by giving her a godly love. Check out the Colossians passage. Do not be harsh with them. Do you understand what that means? Well, I guess I can’t abuse my wife verbally either. No, we can’t. We are to be gentle with her, both physically and emotionally. The bible doesn’t call her the weaker vessel, because God wants us to take advantage of her, on the contrary, we are to take care of her as we would a priceless piece of art, or our car. You know the latter of those is more true of most of us. You get a small ding on your car and you would blow a gasket (pun intended), but if your wife is hurt, it’s her problem. Maybe she’s just dealing with women issues. Remember the sympathy devotional? Whether we understand why she is hurt or not we need to take care of her and have sympathy for her. The last passage above tells us to live with our wives in an understanding way, showing her honor. Honor is not the same thing as respect, we tend to think it is, so we think someone needs to earn our honor. But the bible tells us to honor our father and mother, and this can be done whether we have respect for them or not (this could be the case if you have unsaved parents). So our wife doesn’t earn our honor, but we are always to honor her. And when I honor my wife, I do so by being a godly example for her. I do so by loving her the way God demands me to. I do so, by being gentle with her in ever aspect of the word. I am the head of the house, not because I am better equipped to lead, but because God created me as the head of the house. The closer I am to God, the closer I am to my wife and the easier it is for her to follow me. Men, it’s time to love our wives in a manner that is acceptable to God. -Adam